读《陈鲁豫.心相约》
武汉:长江文艺出版社,2003.7
1。因英语而改变 北京市申办2000年奥运会英语演讲比赛、国际台英语部 师姐
决战莫斯科 -窦文涛2001.7.13
2。情陷伊拉克
3。战争十日谈2003.3.18小布什给萨达姆下达最后48小时最后通牒
新闻:凝聚的历史的瞬间
武汉:长江文艺出版社,2003.7
1。因英语而改变 北京市申办2000年奥运会英语演讲比赛、国际台英语部 师姐
决战莫斯科 -窦文涛2001.7.13
2。情陷伊拉克
3。战争十日谈2003.3.18小布什给萨达姆下达最后48小时最后通牒
新闻:凝聚的历史的瞬间
如水失恋了,她最终也没有把那封信交给男孩,因为一切都结束了。她自尊心太强了,当感觉到空气中的味道不对了,选择了放弃。她告诉男孩,我们还是做朋友好。于是一切归于平淡。
他们的爱情,像水中泛起的涟漪,一圈圈淡去,很美也很平静。从开始到结束,一个月。
我问如水,你怎么评价这段爱情,她说:“还没开始就已经结束,未免有些可惜。”我又问她,“你爱他么?” 她犹豫了一下说,这太难说了,不过他说是,因为我会生他的气。“你对他说过你爱他么?”她笑了,说我小丫头问题还满多的。“到底有没有嘛?”“还没有,” 她说,“如果给我时间,我想我会爱他越来越多的。”
如水的答案让我困惑,我听晕晕的。为什么世人都会为爱情而烦恼。为什么不去工作、去学习、去跳舞。爱情就会在每一天的空气里生根、发芽,长大。
如水,我的舞跳得不错哦,我来教你,我们去跳舞吧。
他们没有吵架,也没有纷争,也就没有解决他们之间的问题。男孩选择放弃。在知道男孩的决定前,她给男孩写了一封信。
My sweetest Baby,
I never expected my first love letter to you like this. But I can’t help but write it down and send it to you.
I should apologize. The moment I walked out of the classroom like a hard-cored stone, leaving you turning back from the seat, staring at me like a stranger, I felt heart-broken. I will never forget that moment my whole life. I ate little that evening. You know I never liked a bike on my own and I never want to separate “yours” from “mine” and “ours”. I never want to fix our date on a certain date, and limited hour. Every moment with you is so dear and happy to me.
I meant to hurt you unconsciously and make my presence felt. Then I realized when you felt hurt, I felt heart-broken. I used to think that you are a heartless optimistic boy, who knows nothing about romance, let alone obstacles in love and life. Although I still believe so, I realized you are not heartless, and not a child any more. You got colorful emotion. You will feel blue and gray, too. The day you looked at me with troubled eyes and frowning, my feeling was complex. I would not eat back my words, but I want to cry. I am just a girl who is familiar to you, but needs your love and caring more than before. Once in love, I just want to be like any common girls, cradling in your arms, shopping with you hand in hand, imagining a carefully designed romantic date in the city or at home. Consider that we have never had such a romantic date, I decided to do something. But if the by-product is your unhappiness, I would rather I did nothing.
Maybe that kind of love is too strong and heavy for our young and innocent heart. Ideal love should promote mutual improvement rather than drown into a deep ocean of love. My sensitivity walked hopelessly into the ocean, and came across your sense, thus comes the troubled moment.
These are my thoughts in the night. I can’t hurt anybody due to my consciousness, let alone your innocent soul. Hope you will recover from the wound of deep love soon.
Lv. Me
如水不肯告诉我他们的甜蜜瞬间,只是告诉我他们有一天吵架了。
如水也是个忙人,但相对于她刚刚在一起的男友是小屋见大屋了。少女心中对于浪漫的定义在作怪,她渴望着能和男友有浪漫的约会,一次次精心策划却因为男友忘了提前告诉她有事儿推迟之后,她再也忍不住了。于是,小小的离家出走了一次。小别再见面或许会很浪漫吧。
她出去玩了两天,然后回来了。周末,这次可是她的时间了。一起吃午饭的时候,如水就开始想着下午休息晚上出去玩。男孩说,晚上约了朋友吃饭,不过他可以陪如水先去吃饭……
如水是个ABC,所以故事只好半中半洋了。她伤心的跟我说了how she fell in love.
It is just like any cliche, I just fall in love unconsciously. Not yet ready to know how to love someone. It’s an art, now I know that.
I thought about that for a long time, and then decided that he deserves my love. I liked him, he is a good guy, and I will love him more day after day. I’m right, I did love him more and more day after day. But I never knew that this sincere love would end so quickly and take my heart away from me.
So how did he pursue you? I asked.
She paused a moment, and said that was his privace, but I can tell you how I tll him I love him. I was too shy to tell him that directly, and looked into every means that was romantic and memorable. Then I found some bookmarks. I bought two sets of bookmarks in my college, and it would become my message to him.
I found out four bookmarks, each containing our constellations. On my ones, I wrote “I persist my own ways”“be happy angry sad and cheerful”. While on his ones, I wrote “fond of chatting and laughing”, she wanted the initial words to be “I am fond of you”. But I couldn’t find a suitable Chinese equivalent idiom,so I wrote “You are a fool”。
The next day, I pretended to come across him, and told him I got four constellations card, and would share them with him. He read the front part carefully to find out if we suit each other from the constellation. And I showed him the tails of the bookmarks quickly, so he would be quick enought to fing the complet meaning . I left two bookmarks to him, which wrote “be happy angry sad and cheerful”“fond of chatting and laughing”. That was my answer to him. Quickly I ran away.
I thought someday if we are together we could share the secret of the bookmarks. He might be a little bit angry that I said that he was silly.
But now the day will never come.
〈谨以此文献给我的朋友如水,愿你快快忘记忧伤,开始新的生活〉
如水是典型的南方女子,生得柔柔弱弱,廋得让人担心。但她骨子里却是个刚强的。颇有些侠骨衷肠。朋友说,第一次见她感觉冷冰冰的,像块石头。
石头让她想起王朔的小说《?》。女人和老公分手后,坚强的挺住悲伤。老公再次爱上她,居然是因为有一次坐车时看到窗外骑自行车的她。她在风中赶路,头发被风吹得乱乱的,表情是一副下定决心找人拼命的样子。男人想起第一次见到她是不知为什么,觉得她的脸长得像一块石头。
如水长的不像石头,她长的像水,虽然不美,却很平静。她也不会头发乱乱的跑出去,对她来说,太不可思议了。她总是光鲜照人,即使不开心的时候。但不知为什么这一刻她想到了这个女人。刚强顽固的活在失去了爱的世界里。
也许不是因为那次相遇,也许不是石头般长像的回忆,也许不是女人怀孕了,她将永远带着这个面具老去枯萎。如水像起了她,想起了自己和她一样的,顽固的刚强的面具。
她的故事很平静,很短。
它是只独行特立的猫,小小的爪子上长着厚厚的肉垫,走路轻盈袅娜,人们往往无法察觉它的存在。
它轻盈的穿梭在人和猫的世界里,无牵无挂,无忧无虑,简单并快乐着。但这种快乐只能从它智慧的大眼睛一眨变成一条线时,才能透过那条线看到,一闪而过。
他相信风的话。风告诉它,你看那朵白云爱上你了。云转来转去,知道为什么么?为了给你遮阳。云多美,和你一样轻盈,自由自在。它想也许风是对的。为什么自己没有发现云的存在呢。于是每天看着云,对它说话。云在空中飘,它在地上走,这是对么幸福的事情呀。
但是它是猫,一只白天活动的猫,不再具有它猫的魅力,不再是猫了。云朵认不出它,也不再对它微笑,自顾自的游荡。风儿也无言。
猫伤心极了。云和猫的爱情,也许只是风的美意,云的初衷。
文学的灵感来自于对美的体会,以及因交流而产生的更深的的体会, 可以从haiku对于各国文学的影响中看到.
俳句Haiku缘于日本,有五六百年历史。Haiku, 用来歌颂生活中细腻的容易被人忽略的美,如一片落叶,一只青蛙,一个游子. 它共有三行,分别为5/7/5个音节. 诗中含有对季节的隐语,以及两个或两个以上的形象. 其形式小巧, 意境优美,受到诗人们的喜爱.
第一次接触haiku却是在英文中.黑人作家Robert Wright.
In the falling snow, a laughing boy holds out his palms, untill they are white.
Their watching faces, as i walk the autumn road, make me a traveler.
非常喜欢他的趣味和意境。读冰心时发现泰戈尔、冰心与其联系。
泰戈尔在它的启发下创作了< 飞鸟集> . 夏天的飞鸟,飞到我窗前唱歌,又飞去了.秋天的黄叶,他们没有什么可唱,只叹息了一声,飞落在那里.
中国女作家冰心又在泰戈尔的启发下,创作了脍炙人口的< 繁星>< 春水>.
< 繁星>第83首: 小弟弟!你恼我么?灯影下,我只管以无嵇的故事,来骗取你,绯红的脸颊,凝注的双眸.
这些文章都不是严格意义上的haiku, 但是去了其中的精华和意境。
其美感是我的粗糙的文字不能尽诉的, 这段文字道出其间意境“台湾元气村”
其在英语中的地位与历史,再此文中可以看到A HISTORY OF THE ENGLISH HAIKU。其广泛流传要在二战后。
看了冰心的《超人》,有一种心灵上的震撼,不得不说出来。因为尽管时代背景不一样,我确曾是一个这样的”超人”。
何斌,文中那个冷心肠的青年,按文章年代1921年,应该是生活在“五四”运动、辛亥革命之后,军阀横行时期。他是悲观迷茫的。“除了例行公事之外,他从来不和别人交往,什么都不爱。”他把尼采的话当作至理名言,“爱和怜悯都是恶”。即便救助了跑街的小孩禄儿,也是因为吵到他休息. 因而他也不接受禄儿的道谢.
他奇怪的理论使我好象看到了自己.我也曾经冷冰冰过. 虽然也有许多朋友真诚地相处, 但不知为什么, 不太喜欢联系. 我的世界象一个孤岛. 我在想友谊是什么. 我向来岛上的人贡献出美酒佳肴,不是因为爱, 只是因为我有. 也许我也爱这些来岛上的人,但一种木讷的和自我的欺骗或不自信, 让我无法体会到与他们一样的如沐春风.
何斌的一段话触动了我的心. 他在给禄儿的信中的坦白,”我给你那医药费,里面不含丝毫的爱和怜悯,不过是拒绝你的呻吟,拒绝我的母亲,拒绝了宇宙和人生,拒绝了爱和怜悯。”他的给予是一种拒绝. 他是善良的,但象一面脏了的镜子, 照不出他本来的模样,以至于他自己怀疑自己心中早已满溢的对母亲的爱,对宇宙和人生的爱. 禄儿的天真擦亮了他的镜子,他看到了自己, 和自己真实的感受.于是, “呜呜咽咽的痛苦了起来”.
我一直以来的苦闷也随着他的泪水痛快淋漓地发泄了出来. 自我封闭和不愿面对象灰尘一样,盖住了我明亮的镜子. 而这篇文章和身边善良的人为我檫亮了镜子,我看到了自己和美的一切.
昨天半夜,朋友忽然打来电话,说他即将签约的那家大公司无法与他签约了,而他又错过了最佳找工作时间。命运总是在捉弄他,他说。
他走过的路的确曲折。
我对于生活的理解是这样的。有些人注定要忙碌,走的路会比别人曲折。比如我,即使做一个教师,一周工作十二个小时,但仍然是早出晚归,忙忙碌碌自己的事。我觉得自己注定要忙碌,所以选择一些自己喜欢的事就是一种幸福。
普罗米修斯,把火种带到人间,这是多么伟大的创造。但是他仍让要在上帝的命令下日复一日把石头推上山,然后眼睁睁的看着石头从山上掉下来。他没有抱怨,日复一日单调无聊的工作着。伟大的人物也是要做单调的工作,琐碎的小事,也要承受命运的刁难。于是这些琐碎也变成了永恒。
没办法,生命在于倒腾。倒腾了几次,也便有了色彩,有了故事,也便有了永恒。
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